Goddammit! Why do I forget that when I find a game that I really enjoy, I forget about my health and job and play it until 5:30 in the morning? In case you’re just tuning in, I’ve been replaying Wind Waker and I’m having a blast. I still have some familiar gripes, but overall I’m addicted and liking it more than I ever have. So therefore this edition of Scatter Storming will be especially scattered. In fact, consider that this very paragraph took three different sessions sprinkled over 9 hours to write. Yes folks, it’s that sort of a day. Let’s get started.
BLING! I like having more Rupees -
One of the best parts of Wind Waker is the fact that larger wallets happen faster and easier than in previous 3D Zelda games. It’s addicting to hack and slash away at grass, so if I can get my Rupee count to 1000 only a few hours into the game instead of getting annoyed that the red rupee I painstakingly found in a treasure chest won’t do me any good is nice. Did that sentence make sense? I don’t care much at this point. Again: it’s that sort of night.
STUPID! That Gametrailers Review that Riddles posted -
I agree that Dragon Age looks super badass and I want it as badly as Riddles wants to make good life choices, but that Gametrailers review was dumb. Seriously, I don’t mind if a review is 10 minutes if half of it isn’t a FUCKING PLOT SUMMARY spoken by a dude who is trying his hardest to be Guy Smiley. I prefer the real Guy Smiley.
I mean Jeff Haynes at my beloved IGN might have an annoying voice, but he only kept in relevant information, and he didn’t think he was at an audition for Deal or No Deal.
PLEASE! Wind Waker in HD -
That’s all I could think last night as Wind Waker sucked up 4 hours of my precious sleeping time. It was a very particular line of thinking:
-”WOW Wind Waker still looks good”
-”It helps that it’s in 480p and I’ve never seen it like that before”
-”Also, although my screen is high-def, it’s also smaller, so the blemishes are a little more hidden”
-”Man, but imagine it WAS in high-def? Holy shit”
-”What the fuck? Stupid fake 16:9 cutscenes. Give me my real HD widescreen, Nintendo! Stupid asshole bitches!”
Man, I’m a sailor when I’m tired and sick.
SUCK IT, readers. Let’s move on.
DONE! <- Those stupid slugs -
They’re getting old. I know the concept of this whole thing is crappy old comic books, but the “cover” does the trick there. So fuck that shit!
Riddles’ Mom probably hates me now -
I swear a lot on Riddlethos. And in life in general. I met (most) of his family when I went down to Tennessee for the launch of this masterpiece of a site, and we got along famously. I thought they were all lovely! However, now that she’s seen my callous, bitter, incredibly crude side, I might no longer be in her good books. I hope I am, but you know what Resistance 2 says: “hope for the best, but prepare for the worst”.
Riddles probably hates me now -
For talking about his mom.
HYPOCRISY! Okay, I can do a slug once in a while if I want to -
See, that hypocrite thing works on two levels! One for the slug, and one for the following: I caved on my FFXIII media boycott. I’m still not really re-watching things, or intensely analyzing screenshots, but I’ve seen recent stuff that I said I wouldn’t. Still, I lasted a while, and I think it’s made me shake my hype fatigue. So I’ll leave this incredibly terrible Scatter Storming issue with an incredibly suggestive picture featuring everybody’s favourite Final Fantasy XIII character:
COKEY!!!!
Only wasps can come quietly.
(props to RPGamer for the screen)
ETHOS OUT, MOTHER FUCKERS!
Tags: Final Fantasy XIII, Scatter Storming, The Legend of Zelda: Wind Waker
I havn’t seen the DAO review, but on the whole I find Gametrailers video reviews to be far better than their IGN equivolent.
-P.S. Lol at you sizing up Oliver’s parents as future inlaws, he hasn’t put a ring on it yet.
- Toon link looks buff in that picture. It’ hot.
- Cokey! Man, if possible, she looks even more strung out in that picture. I assumed it was kind of a bad screengrab before, but so far she’s 0/2. (And seriously, “Shut up and come quietly”? Sounds like Riddles when Ethos is spending the night.)
@SN: Sure, there’s no ring yet, but a girl can dream, can’t he?
-I’m banking on her looking better in motion, if not WTF?
-Ah, good point, but it’s probably premature to be shopping for wedding dresses …
@SN – Well that’s the only Gametrailers review I’ve seen, so I definitely can’t judge them all. I just like that the IGN reviews are obviously opinion and personality based rather than trying to be something they’re not.
And guys, guys, Oliver and I are still in the courting stages.
GT reviews can be quite critical, and well produced, with a very good selection of footage. They are also not frightened to go against the grain; they gave FFXII a 7/10.
Yeah, like I said, I’m not going to judge GT reviews on a whole since I just saw the one.
Although, as a 10 year fan on IGN, despite their reputation, they score based on personal opinion, no matter which way the grain is going.
Speaking of FFXII, though, except for Jeremy Dunham (who reviewed it and isn’t even there anymore), everyone at IGN hates it. I, obviously, still love it.
The thing about that site that is hit and miss with people is that they DO often choose the people who will be most likely to love the game they’re reviewing.