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by Ethos

Hey! Look! Listen! Audio Edition #002

Friday, July 9th, 2010

The podcast you wished had disappeared forever is back! With no Riddles nor Pogo, Constipated Cow steps up, and the results are disastrous! If you’re in a particularly masochistic mood, listen to these two idiots struggle for things to say and finally settle on creating demeaning situations for Cow’s girlfriend. To make things worse, Ethos wrote a terrible theme song that doesn’t suit the podcast one bit!

Please to enjoy.

Download directly here.

Subscribe to the RSS feed here.

Subscribe to it on iTunes here.

Tingle! Tingle! Kooloo-Limpah! #006

Friday, April 30th, 2010

Holy crapsticks! Did I ever walk into a wagon full of news! This will definitely be more than 2 stories, so let’s dive in!

God of War Tease Levels Up Again

If you haven’t been paying attention, it turns out that God of War III gives players a “secret” URL after they Platinum the title. “Secret” was in quotes because the website is obviously public knowledge now. The website depicts a rainy scene with occasional lighting flashes revealing a figure (potentially a reflection) that looks suspiciously like Kratos. The interesting thing about this site is that there is an icon in the top right corner that has been filling up slowly since the website was discovered. So far there has been an update to the site each time the icon fills up another corner in the circle.

Initially on March 18, when the bar was a quarter full, it was a similar scene, but it was barely raining, and there was no figure on the left. Then, on March 28, it was half full and the weather incorporated heavy thunderstorms. Finally on April 28th, it reached its current state with the figure on the left and the mysterious figure appearing in the water. The going theory is that the gauge fills a bit every time somebody obtains a platinum trophy in the game. I’m a little curious why every update has ended with an “8″. The former is a cooler idea though.

Activision Bungies Back

Despite analysts saying that Infinity Ward is essentially done for (big surprise), Activision has stayed in the headlines for a different reason. Legendary Halo creator, Bungie, has singed a 10-year exclusive publishing deal with the big bad Activision giant. Community manager for Bungie, Brian Jarrard confirmed that they are “looking at a multi-platform release,” although he didn’t give specifics on which platforms or what type of game. At this point we can assume that it will not be Halo and it very likely won’t involve the Wii.

Also, despite Bungie stating that this has been in the works for years, and analysts speculating that this is good for gamers in general, the announcement does seem a little timely with the mass exodus of Infinity Ward employees. I can’t imagine the timing of this announcement doesn’t have everything to do with Activision wanting to save face.

Linux? Seriously?
Remember when Linux support was ousted out of the PS3 Slim? And then 3 people cried? Well in March, Sony released a firmware update that included removing the “other OS” support from all consoles and 3 more people cried. Apparently one of those people cried a lot because Anthony Ventura of California has filed a class action lawsuit against Sony on “behalf of himself and all others similarly situated. The lawsuit basically says “you promised us Linux! You promised! And now you’ve left me all alone! I thought we’d be together forever! You promised!”

If you have absolutely nothing better to do with your life, you can read the whole filing here.

Not actually from the game, but I wouldn't be surprised.

Now Your Little Sister Can Be Your Wife!
The Japan only 360 title “My Wife: A Wife Just For You”, isn’t such a surprise in itself. Dating sims are popular in Japan, and the ability to create your wife (within the game’s choices) and go through various stages of romancing her isn’t so surprising or new. Why this game’s announcement caught my eye wasn’t the concept or even the “Sleep Together Mode” so much as some of the descriptions of your wife. Two of her personality options are “big sister type” and “little sister type”. Yup. I’m not joking.

Well that’s it! More than last time, ‘eh? DOUBLE to be factually accurate. Riddles may wank to Kotaku, but at least I balance that with my IGN masturbation. Anyway, the battery is low on my compy, and I have dishes and laundry and showering and washing the bathroom and playing Patapon 2 to do! Later!

Hey! Look! Listen!

Wednesday, February 3rd, 2010


What’s worse than February?

This recurring “news” column, that’s what. This barely informative, self-gratifying, irregularly updated EXCUSE for videogame journalism.

I feel sorry for anyone who’s about to read it, frankly. But hey, everyone’s gotta bite the bullet and eat a shit sandwich at some point in their lives. For the lot of you, that day is today.

So let’s get this over with.

lusiMegaphones Ahoy! Celebrates its 50th Podcast

A lot of you probably don’t need to be informed of this, but for those of you who don’t listen to Lusipurr.com’s Megaphones Ahoy! Podcast, there’s never been a better time to start. Both myself and Ethos guest star in this special, double-sized 50th podcast. I’m there for the whole thing, while Ethos’ airtime is limited to a 15-minute pre-recorded segment. Kinda stupid, actually, but so is he.

Click here to download the cast. Alternatively, you could get it on iTunes. Or you could click that big freaking banner to the left to go straight to the website itself. Choices, choices!

I like this guy already.

Mass Effect 2 Sells 2  Million

We have our first official videogame blockbuster of 2010, folks, and it’s Mass Effect 2. Here’s some PR spin for you:

Forty perfect scores. Two million units. One pop culture phenomenon. BioWare™, a division of Electronic Arts Inc. (NASDAQ: ERTS), announced today that Mass Effect™ 2 has sold-in over two million units worldwide in its first week of release*. Lauded for its intense shooter gameplay and deep, hand-crafted story, Mass Effect 2 has earned an average review score of 96** — making it the second highest rated game of all time on the Xbox 360

I’ll admit to being a little surprised. I knew Mass Effect 2 would be big, but 2 million units in a week is huge.

Then again, I’ve never seen so many people at my GameStop for the game’s midnight premiere. Not even for Modern Warfare 2. (VG247)

Heavy RainHeavy Rain Requires 4.2 Gig Install, Lets You Make Origami

Quantic Dreams’ interactive movie, Heavy Rain, will size in at a whopping 4.2 gigabytes. 4.2 gigabytes that you’ll be required to install before booting the game up. But never fear, because Quantic Dream was reportedly nice enough to include a 12-step origami minigame that you can play while performing the install.

I’m not sure that a 12-step origami piece will be enough to occupy the average gamer for 4.2 GB worth of install time, but hey, the effort is appreciated.

I haven’t talked much about Heavy Rain on Riddlethos.com, but I’m actually really looking forward to the game. I’m somewhat familiar with Quantic Dream’s previous works, having played approximately half of Indigo Prophecy back in the day. I really liked it, too – which makes me wonder why I stopped playing it.

Not interested in Heavy Rain? This video might change your mind. It features the main (female) protagonist naked. No, really. There are boobs and everything. Damn nice ones, too, as far as digitally rendered stuff goes. (VG247)

ps3slimSony Hopes to Bring More PS1/PS2 Classics to PSN, Considering Charging for PSN

IGN recently interviewed Peter Dille, Sony’s senior vice president of marketing. He’s also the man “in charge” of Sony’s PSN service.

The interview is very, very good, and there are more than a few things to latch onto and discuss. Two things in particular caught my attention: the discussion of PS2 games coming to PSN, and the possibility that Sony may go the way of Xbox Live and charge for their online service.

When asked about PS1 and PS2 classics on PSN, Dille responded that they’re “working really hard” on making more of them available. From the interview:

By all means, I think people can look for more of that because once the third-parties see how this works, it’s just found money. There’s not a whole lot of work that has to go into it and once we can get it up on the network, it finds an audience pretty quickly.

“Found money” is an excellent way to put it. On all accounts, there is absolutely no reason for PS2 games (and more PS1 games) to be on PlayStation Network. Peter Dille said it himself. I suppose it’s a matter of getting third-party developers on board, but frankly, that shouldn’t be difficult for Sony to do. So. Where are the PS2 classics?

IGN asked quite a few questions about Sony’s PlayStation Network, and one of them was if Sony ever planned to charge for it. From the interview:

It’s been our philosophy not to charge for it from launch up until now, but Kaz recently went on the record as saying that’s something we’re looking at. I can confirm that as well. That’s something that we’re actively thinking about. What’s the best way to approach that if we were to do that? You know, no announcements at this point in time, but it’s something we’re thinking about.

And… ugh. I am not in support of this. I buy multiplatform games for the PS3 for a few reasons, and the main one is that if I ever feel like playing online, I can do it for free. I don’t play enough to be considered “hardcore,” and certainly not enough to justify a $50 Xbox Live subscription, but I enjoy the occasional round of, say, Modern Warfare 2.

If Sony does introduce some type of subscription model, I sincerely hope it only applies to “premium” content – like, say, exclusive demos or videos.

I know $50 a year isn’t much to ask, and I know that people have the idea that it “pays for the stability.” But playing games online is not and should not be considered “premium content.”

I encourage you to check out the full interview here.


Here’s a few rapid-fire headlines for you. Short, sweet, and not really worth writing about at length.

Final Fantasy XIII Will Ship on Three Discs – As long as one of them doesn’t sit in a paper sleeve. (I’m looking at you, Lost Odyssey)

Final Fantasy XIV Is Coming to Xbox 360 – According to VG247, this has been “obvious for a while,” but it came as a surprise to me.

And just because we have a bit of a Simpsons thing going this week, I figured I’d include this image from the latest episode:


I should watch that show more often.

Well. Between a long night at work and frequent South Park-induced distractions, this thing went up a bit later than I anticipated. But hey, at least I did it, right? If nothing else, it means you don’t have to suffer another one of Ethos’ pathetic attempts to match my news-condensing prose.

Which is almost as bad as February, but not quite. ‘Till next time!

Hey! Look! Listen!

Tuesday, September 22nd, 2009

Another Tuesday, another edition of Hey! Look! Listen! for your reading pleasure. I’m your host Oliver Motok, and… you knew that already.

I started Ultimate Alliance 2 last night. I wasn’t blown away, but then, I only played the first hour or so. I’ve yet to even reach the start of the “Civil War” storyline, which is the main thing about the game that interests me. (Any other Marvel Comics nerds in the crowd who know what I’m talking about?) Of course, any game hot on the heels of Arkham Asylum is going to suffer for it.

Anyway. Let’s move on to the NEWS.



Hey, Yakuza 3 is Being Localized After All
I’ve never played Yakuza so I really don’t give a crap, but I imagine there’s plenty of people out there who do. So, to all the fans of Sega’s mafia-glorifying beat-em-up, REJOICE. According to 1UP, a “source close to the project” has informed them that the game is, in fact, being localized for North America. While this should still be taken with a grain of salt, it’s believable for two reasons: first, Sega hasn’t come forward to speak against the rumor, which only adds credibility. Second, it’s not completely out of left field – just last week, Sega of America assistant community manager Aaron Webber said that a North American release was not out of the question, as had been previously rumored.

“The original news story that went around about Yakuza 3 being declined for the US was false, and localizing the game still remains a big point of discussion for many people here at SEGA, and especially those of us on SEGA’s community team,” wrote Webber on the PlayStation Blog

I’m gonna go ahead and venture a guess that this is legit. Look for an official announcement at the upcoming Tokyo Game Show.

PlayStation 2, Dreamcast Titles May be Coming to PlayStation Network
Well, it was only a matter of time I suppose. Perhaps you recall a patent discover by Siliconera back in June, related to a technology that would allow the PlayStation 3 to emulate the Emotion Engine, and hence, play PS2 software. However, it’s been a number of months since we’ve heard any further developments

However, with a leaked document discovered by French site Objectif-Sega, the rumor mill is turning yet again. The document is apparently a list of notes from a meeting between Sega of America and Robert Dyer, senior vice president of publisher relations for Sony Computer Entertainment America. Among many other notes (take a look at the full article, it’s quite intriguing) is a brief mention of a PS2 emulator for the PS3 – which is listed as “confidential.” In addition to that is a note entitled “DC Digital Titles,” stating that Sony is interested in providing Dreamcast games for download.

MmmmHM. Interesting, very interesting. And it makes complete sense. Regardless of how trustworthy this particular “leak” may be, I have no doubt that PS2 games will be available on the PSN at some point in the future. There are, after all, over 1800 titles in the system’s library; offering them as digital downloads would only be another way for Sony to milk that cash cow. While it’s not quite as welcome as disc-based backwards compatibility would be, I’ll be happy to take what I can get at this point.



Valkyria Chronicles Trophies Still Possible
Again, this doesn’t really interest me, as much as I love Valkyria Chronicles. However, I’m happy to see that it’s (possibly) still receiving some support from both fans and its publisher. Also, I happen to know that dear Ethos would be a happy little Trophy whore if this were to come true.

Last Ranker May be Coming to North America
You familiar with Capcom’s upcoming RPG, Last Ranker? No? Me neither. In fact, I’d heard nothing about it until I learned that it had been trademarked in the US. And, while I still know nothing about it, I was intrigued by the names attached to the project – among them being Kazishige Nojima and Yoko Shimomura of Kingdom Hearts fame. Nojima was one of the chief writers of the Kingdom Hearts series, while Shimomura composed the music.

And that’s all I have. Other than a few bombshells, news has been relatively slow as of late. A calm before the storm of the Tokyo Game Show, methinks. ‘Till next time, dear readers.

I Play More PS3 Than Riddles…

Sunday, August 9th, 2009

…and I don’t even own one! Ha ha ha ha!
Yes, I just beat Uncharted: Drake’s Fortune in a single sitting.
It. Was. Awesome.
I’m so excited for the sequel now, and it’s getting more and more ridiculous that I don’t own my own PS3 yet.
Anyway, I’m surprised Uncharted didn’t get more credit for having absolutely fantastic voice acting and dialogue. If any of you saw the featurettes, you’d know that they took a lot of the actual voice work from the elaborate motion capture scenes. The voice actors would act out the scenes with each other with set pieces and full out blocking. The result was extremely effective, and it’s little wonder the characters felt so alive. Obviously the environment in which actors get to record makes a world of difference.
Anyway, the game rocks for many more reasons than that, but if you want a review, go to the 329875392752301432309 other sites that will also tell you it’s awesome. Anyway, if you couldn’t tell that I liked it from all of that, here’s a masterpiece of a valdalized jpeg that sums up how I feel about the badass lead character.


Friday, July 31st, 2009

hahuhIn return for the jabs Riddles took at my “lightweight” status, karma has made his PS3 double broken.
That means that his PS3 broke – a trend that is becoming increasingly common – so he proceeded to send it into Sony and they sent it back more broken than when it was originally broken.
This story is even more tragic when you compound the fact that he bought it about two years ago, and so the repairs weren’t covered.
In my mind, the situation went down something like:

-The disc drive on Riddles’ PS3 breaks.
-Riddles sends it in, pays $150 for Sony’s trouble and has to go without a PS3 for a week.
-Sony receives Riddles’ PS3.
-Sony PUNCHES Riddles’ PS3.
-Said PS3 returns in worse condition than before and now also freezes while playing downloadable games; distinctly not a problem with the disc drive.

Maybe I get too tipsy, too fast on really fruity drinks, but at least my non-existent PS3 works better than Riddles’ over-sized paper weight.
In other news, who thought I’d be looking forward to Forza 3? Not me, that’s who.