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by Ethos

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Wednesday, March 9th, 2011

Read this.
I brought this up a while ago on Riddlethos, and I’m with the author 100%. There is deep rooted sexism everywhere, even with the best of intentions.
#TheLastGuardian #GenderEquality #TeamICO

Ethos’ Hype List: The Last Guardian

Tuesday, March 8th, 2011

I'm fairly certain this is NOT official box art

If you remember, this game was actually in my “games with hesitations” list at the beginning of the week.

But unlike my hesitations for Infamous 2 and Uncharted 3, this time I’m only trying to protect myself. Shadow of the Colossus is probably the last game I remember that not only lived up to my incredible hype, but exceeded that hype. I know already that my expectations are too high for this game.

I suppose I’m also slightly thrown off by the more enclosed spaces and the presence of more enemies in comparison to SotC. Although I’m glad that it’s trying to be its own game.

I’m less nervous about the cat/griffin/bird thing (known as Trico) needing constant care now. I was initially worried that I’d have to maintain it like some well-animated Tamagotchi, but that’s not the way it’s being described now. It feels more like building a relationship. Kinda like in Dragon Age, but instead of dialogue choices, Trico will respond to everything you do.

Or maybe it’ll be annoying as shit, but who knows.

In fact, I expect to be frustrated at times, but will that be defendable within the context of the game? We all get annoyed at the ones we’re closest to, and there are always hurdles in a new relationship.

That being said, I think that point can only be argued if the other sides of the relationship are equally rewarding, or even more so. And if the frustrations come from Trico’s personality and not poor game mechanics.

Hell, writing this article is making me excited. Back to Dragon Age for me. It’s awesome, by the way.

Anticipation Level: 25/27

Welcome to Most Anticipated Games Week

Wednesday, March 2nd, 2011

I don't really even care about Batman, but I'm excited for this game.

Well Riddles got his chance to write about Back to the Future: The Game, but only came up with a video of his friend playing it. So I’m moving on.

This year is fucking insane for us gamers.
This is the calm before the storm. Quite literally. Because next week both Pokémon and Dragon Age 2 will be released, then Infamous soon after, then the 3DS, Team ICO collection, then nonstop blockbuster AAA titles until all of our faces fall off.

This week – at least – I will talk about the games I have unbridled excitement for (see: Dragon Age 2, Mass Effect 3, Pokémon White, Batman: Arkham City). I will talk about games that I am excited for with hesitation of varying levels (see: Uncharted 3, The Last Guardian, Infamous 2) and games that I am tentatively excited for (see: Skyward Sword).

That last category probably wouldn’t even exist without the latest gameplay trailer for Zelda. I’m all for a little context sensitive swordplay, but based on that trailer, it looks like the entire thing is motion gimmick after motion gimmick. It’s like Nintendo hasn’t realized that their controller sucks and is really, really old. Even with the expensive fix.

There’s actually a lot more I have to say about that, but I’ll leave it to the specific article. I hope to write one for at least each of the games I’ve already mentioned. Can you feel it? Gaming is going to give a hell of a year before the 2012 apocalypse.

Tingle! Tingle! Kooloo-Limpah! #014 – STOLEN!!

Friday, September 17th, 2010

Oh lookit me! I’m Riddles! I’m gonna say that Ethos won’t write anything! Well fuck you! I’m going to steal that TGS Hey! Look! Listen! you promised. Bah-ha ha ha. Well, not every piece of big TGS news, just the stuff I care about.

Dear God, yes.

Team ICO Out the Ass: The Last Guardian Release Date

Finally we hear more about this ridiculously-anticipated title. People seem to be shocked that this was given a Holiday 2011 release window, but that comes as no surprise to me. In fact, that’s in the early range of what I was expecting, so count me as excited.

What’s that in the distance? Sounds like some sort of whistle. And now I see smoke? What could that possibly be…oh it’s the hype train! Full speed ahead!(IGN)

Team ICO Out the Ass: ICO and Shadow of the Collossus HD Collection!

BAH-HA HA HA HA HA AH! FINALLY! My life is complete! This long-rumoured collection is finally a reality. At first there was talk about it being two separate discs but has since been confirmed to be a single Blu-ray disc compete with trophies, the PAL ending for ICO, and even improved framerates, textures, and new widescreen framing. This collection is why humanity was created. (IGN)

Team ICO Out the Ass: Sexism Battle!

Remember when Miyamata joked about Peach not being playable in Super Mario Bros Wii because they would have to animate her dress? Remember when we all puked? Well as excited-out-my-ass as I am for The Last Guardian, studio head, Fumito Ueda was talking at TGS and even if his comments were meant as a joke, I still cringed.

He mentioned that the original protagonist for The Last Guardian was going to be female but because girls wouldn’t have the same physical strength as boys when traversing the environment, and “girls wear skirts”, they changed it to a boy.

Yeah, bullshit. I know that scientifically, the anatomy of men and women are different and strength arguments are occasionally valid. Like separating sports in the Olympics. But I don’t think it would have been unreasonable for a little girl to accomplish the same tasks as a little boy. That doesn’t sit well with me. And yeah, girls couldn’t wear Peter Pan-style capri shorts. That would seem weird. Fuck off. (IGN)

Muramasa and Odin Sphere Heavily Rumoured To Also Go HD

Sweet. This doesn’t appear to be a HD collection for PS3, but rather downloadable HD ports for all capable systems. Apparently Muramasa’s assets were developed in HD, so the process should be rather simple for that title at least.

I just hope the framerate is improved for Odin Sphere. I liked that game, but it was literally like a slide-show at points. That will need to be better for me to pick it up. (1up)

Unaltered picture of Bobby Kotick. Thanks Destructoid.

Idiot

Ugh. Just when you thought Activision and Blizzard’s marriage wasn’t affecting the Blizzard side of things, Bobby Kotick goes off and starts spewing more of his famous shit about packing together all the cutscenes of
Starcraft 2 and selling it as a movie. Idiot. Seriously.

I mean, Starcraft 2 was just his example, but he talks about this idea like it’s the most brilliant shit in the history of time. Who the fuck would spend $20-$30 to watch all the cutscenes of a game? Certainly not the people who bought the game, and certainly not the people who didn’t buy the game.

There are reasons that these cutscenes are cutscenes. If you bought one of these “movies”, there would be major plot holes, it would all be high-intensity, and – oh yeah – THERE WOULD BE NO FUCKING GAME TO PLAY!

What a giant fucking idiot. (IGN)

That’s it.

Chalk up another win for Ethos.

Tingle! Tingle! Kooloo-Limpah! #011

Sunday, August 8th, 2010

All right, here goes. The first in a collection of catch-up posts for this week. Let’s jump into this week’s news. Or at least the news that caught my eye.

We Will Likely be Able to See This Game At Last (Guardian)!

Thank fuck. I think most people were surprised that The Last Guardian was a complete no-show during E3. Not even old footage during a sizzle reel. I know that Team Ico takes its sweet time with its games, but it was a disappointing to not even get a small update. After E3, everybody looked ahead to the Tokyo Game Show as the new platform to hopefully show off the anticipated title. Luckily, it is now more promising than ever. The head of Team Ico, Fumito Ueda, replied to a fan on Twitter saying, “We should be able to show something at Tokyo Game Show, so look forward to it.” While he did not specifically mention The Last Guardian, I can’t imagine he was talking about anything else.

Except maybe a Team Ico HD Collection. Which wouldn’t be so bad either.

Either way, TGS is in about a month, so clench your fists with excitement until then!
(IGN)

I'm guessing this game has an all-female development team

Nippon Ichi Has More Financial Trouble; Cancel Games, Spank Women as Punishment

Poor Nippon Ichi. Despite their popular Disgaea series, their wealth of acutely bizarre other titles haven’t been as friendly in the sales department. As such, the company has been in some financial trouble recently, experiencing a 40% drop in sales this quarter when compared to the same period last year. Although they technically still made a profit, restructuring and ongoing money problems affect that figure.

To try to curb a tailspin, Nippon Ichi has cancelled three titles that they say have been in development since last year and will take a 21 million yen loss for it. Although refusing to reveal the titles, they did cite expected difficulty achieving high sales and quality as the reason for the cancellations.

In spite of this news, the company continues to work on a PSP RPG titled Criminal Girls. The premise is that a group of girls have been banished to hell and you must train them physically and mentally to help them back to the land of the living. How does one train these generously proportioned women? By spanking and massaging them, of course!

I wonder what sort of projects they cancelled…
(IGN)

Badass

Batman And The City

Everybody was talking about how Batman: Arkham Asylum 2 was a dumb name on account of the game not actually taking place in the fictitious prison. Well apparently Rocksteady Studios thought the same thing because Warner Brothers recently announced the new name, Batman: Arkham City. While the city is indeed Gotham, it is apparently the new home for all the maximum security criminals that Gotham – and Batman – seem to attract.

You – like me – might be wondering whose bright idea it was to bring all the crazy-ass criminals of the Batman universe closer to the civilians, but there is no answer yet. No further information was given except that the game should be releasing next Fall for PS3, 360, and PC. Oh, and Catwoman seems to be playing a significant part, so… there’s that.
(IGN)

QUICKIES:

Birth by Sleep Preview- This isn’t really news, but it’s nice to see such a positive impression from a Kingdom Hearts fan.

Sony Rips it Up in Japan - PS3 and PSP own that island!

There you go, post one of at least 3 on this glorious day of content!

Sunday Soapbox: Are We The Waiting – E3 Hopes and Dreams

Sunday, June 13th, 2010

Hoo-ah. It’s Sunday. E3 2010 kicks off in less than 36 hours. For people like myself, this is something to get excited for. E3 2010 is the single greatest deluge of gaming information in a given year. Exciting announcements, tons of demonstrations, tons of new videos and media, and of course, impressions from the show floor. Like all E3’s before it, E3 2010 will set the general tone and direction of the game industry for the next  year. So, it’s a big deal, and it’s definitely something to be excited for as a gamer.

E3 is almost like Christmas for gamers. Every year, there are those couple of announcements or game reveals that we’re desperately hoping to see. Sometimes our wishes come true, and sometimes they don’t – but, hell, making up the wishlist is half the fun anyway. So. Without further ado, let’s discuss some things I’m expecting – or hoping – to come out of E3 2010

New Wii Zelda Title – Well, this one’s a given. We’ve been looking for concrete information on this game ever since we got over Twilight Princess – which, if you’re like me, wasn’t too long after release. Sure, we’ve had a few clever handheld titles to tide us over, but Toon Link’s dual-screened appeal is wearing thin, if you ask me. We need a new Zelda game. Die-hard Zelda fanboys like myself are losing faith, and that’s something that I, personally, never thought could happen. I’ve all but given up on Nintendo as a company; all I ask now is for them to give me Zelda – alive and unspoiled.

The Last Guardian

This is a similar case, actually. It’s been five years since Team ICO gave us Shadow of the Colossus. I understand, of course, that if they hope to live up to SotC’s brilliant standard, it’ll require some time. But, the cat’s been out of the bag for a while – they released a trailer last year, if your recall. And then, we didn’t hear a thing. Hopefully, with E3 2010, that will change.

Oh, and confirmation of the rumored Shadow of the Colossus/ICO HD remixes (ala God of War collection) would also be great. Eh? Eh, Sony? Come on, now.

Persona 5, Anyone…?

This one’s a bit of a long shot, but it’s not impossible. I wasn’t sure if Atlus would be at the show, initially, but a quick Google search confirmed that they are – and while a Persona 5 isn’t on their list of games to showcase, perhaps a surprise reveal could be in store? The Persona series has performed well enough in the states; I think E3 would be a fine place to announce it. For PS3. Please.

Ninja Theory’s Devil May Cry 5

This has been rumored in the past, and I’d love to see it confirmed at the show. Ninja Theory, the developer behind Heavenly Sword and the soon- to-be-released Enslaved: Odyssey to the West might be the developers behind the fifth installment of Capcom’s demon-slaying franchise. It’s definitely a franchise that could use a shot in the arm, especially if it’s to contend with the high bar set by Bayonetta. And who knows, Ninja Theory might be the ones to do it.

Kingdom Hearts 3

Last, but certainly not least. It’s been over four years since Kingdom Hearts II. I’m losing interest in the franchise fast. I don’t want to see it devolve into an endless stream of portable spin-offs. Nomura needs to get his shit together, and give us some info on the next real installment in the Kingdom Hearts story. Am I right, or am I right?

Well, that’s my wishlist. Or a part of it, at least. I could go on and on about E3 wishes, but I have to work tomorrow morning. And besides, the show will start soon enough anyway – so all wishful thinking will be rendered moot.

Scatter Storming. Issue #018 “I Have Giant Testicles”

Wednesday, February 3rd, 2010

ss018Well these “classy” series Scatter Stormings didn’t stay classy for very long. This cover is a screengrab from an old sketch “comedy” movie I made with a dear friend of mine. “I have giant testicles” is a line from the scene that that unfortunate grab was taken from. I decided it would be appropriate to have something horrible as the cover for the first February issue of this illustrious feature, so there we have it. Let’s talk about games.

I miss Mass Effect -
Apparently when you go back to work, you’re unable to play video games as often. Who knew? Luckily, tomorrow’s my last day before the 3 week Olympic break. I will beat it then. I truly miss it. Like how one might miss a lover.

Darksiders 2?! -
Speaking of games I miss. I’m really looking forward to polishing off this gem after I knock out Mass Effect and before Final Fantasy 13 eats up my life. Now this is more in the realm of news, but this story broke after Riddles’ fantastic HLL on Tuesday. The point is that Darksiders did well and THQ isn’t stupid, so we’re getting a sequel. Yes please. (IGN)

More IGN Flamebait articles -
But, truly, I like it. It emphasizes the personalities of the site, and I’ve always been an advocate of that. Hell, look at Riddlethos, just since Sunday, Riddles has recounted a day in his life and posted a hideous picture of himself, while I posted a Facebook conversation and featured myself in my boxers this week. Anyway, controversial loudmouth, Greg Miller is a renowned PS3 fanboy but writes about how he thinks Mass Effect 2 is better than Uncharted 2. Frankly, I agree. Read it here and tell me if you agree.

The Last Guardian non-news -
This is starting to read more like a Tingle! Tingle! Kooloo-Limpah! feature, but hey, it’s what’s on my mind. Fumito Ueda is The Last Guardian’s director and recently joined in the latest craze: releasing news about releasing news. Yes, in an interview, Ueda talked about how The Last Guardian might be talked about E3 if Sony wants to. Great. Good stuff. Thanks. Basically confirms that this game is coming out in 2013. I’m barely joking. Kingdom Hearts 3 will come out before this shit. Hey…I wonder if that’ll be announced…

A New Development -
Speaking of that Facebook conversation I posted, there’s no better way to end this segment than with his reply that came just recently. Yes, folks, you can’t deny it: February sucks.
sucks

TGS 2009: Hey! Look! Listen!

Thursday, September 24th, 2009

Day two of the Tokyo Game Show is upon us, and there’s yet to be an announcement that even remotely interests me. Where’s the Kingdom Hearts III news? Where’s a North American FFXIII release date? Where’s a new Zelda announcement? Oh wait, that’s right, Nintendo doesn’t even attend TGS. Even if they were there, they’d just announce another fat people game. BAH.

Ah well, I suppose I’ll fill you in on the few things worth discussing.

Yeah, I think that's pre-rendered.

Yeah, I think that's pre-rendered.

TRAILER WATCH: Final Fantasy XIV
Let’s start with the most worthwhile thing to come out of the show: A new Final Fantasy XIV trailer! It’s really quite pretty. I want this game. A lot. And I didn’t even like Final Fantasy XI that much. Unfortunately, GameTrailers resident HaloWars298 doesn’t seem to share my opinion:

“Will turn out to be crap, just like WoW. Epic needs to show these scrubs how it’s done, I think a Gears TPS MMO could be much better than this stinky.”

I really need to stop giving random internet morons the proverbial 15 seconds of fame…

NEW FOOTAGE WATCH: The Last Guardian
Okay, so Ethos already mentioned this in his most recent issue of Scatter Storming. And it’s not that exciting anyway; Fumito Ueda waxes artsy for a bit, and then shows off about a minute of new “footage.” Still, if you’re prematurely ejaculating over the game like I am, you’ll likely enjoy it. This GameTrailers video is much better quality than the shit Ethos linked you to yesterday.

BITCH

BITCH

RELEASE DATE/TRAILER WATCH: Splinter Cell: Conviction
Gah, I don’t care about Splinter Cell! But it’s a big game, and it finally has a release date. That release date is February 23, 2010. Which, incidentally, is two weeks after BioShock 2 is set for release. What significance does that fact hold? None. None whatsoever. Anyway, if you’re interested, check out this shiny new “release date announcement trailer” that premiered at TGS.

White Knight Chronicles 2 Announced
Well, isn’t this exciting. A sequel to a kinda-sorta-popular JRPG that hasn’t yet been released outside of Japan. The only reason I consider this news at all is because SUPPOSEDLY, we Americans will receive a localized version of the original White Knight Chronicles someday. And if I were to buy, play, and enjoy White Knight Chronicles, then I’d likely be interested in the sequel. But I doubt I’ll even buy WKC, and if I do, I probably won’t play it. So why the hell am I even wasting my time talking about the sequel? Don’t ask me. It’s been a slow TGS so far. (Kotaku).

Well folks, I must admit, I’m not impressed. I think I said that already, but I’ll say it again. I’m not impressed, and I won’t be until The Legend of Zelda: Not a Gimmicky DS Game is announced. OH WAIT THAT WON’T HAPPEN.

FUCK TGS, MAN.

Scatter Storming. Issue #003

Wednesday, September 23rd, 2009

ss003Alright! I held off on posting this in case the TGS Press Conference held anything. It didn’t. But that’s fine, I think Sony has one later “today”, and Riddles will be all over that. As for now, let’s get to my all-over-the-place brain.

SWEET! Lost Winds 2! -
What?! I didn’t know this game was coming out! Amazing! In my opinion, there are very, very few games that justify the Wii’s existence as a Wiimote-based console, but Lost Winds is one of them. It’s clever, has great art design, music that’s not entirely dissimilar to Shadow of the Colossus, and addicting controls. The first one was short and sweet, and come out pretty much around WiiWare’s launch. I remember hearing that the developers intended on making a sequel, but there was silence for a very long time. Although it was my homepage three years ago, I rarely check the Wii channel of IGN anymore, but I’m glad I decided to wander by the other day. This is absolutely reason to switch on that little white box again.

BUH? Magnacarta 2 -
What is this game? I’ve never heard of this game. What is this game? What? Is it supposed to be any good? Why didn’t anybody tell me about it? The screens look good. What? This looks like a major, epic JRPG release exclusive to the 360 and nobody told me about it! WHAT THE CRAP?!?! Maybe it’s supposed to suck, I heard the first one did. But still!

PRETTY! The Last Guardian footage -
There was some new footage shown at TGS. Meet the new footage, same as the old footage. Still, I obviously want this game. Off Screen video here.

PRESS RELEASED! Wii Price Cut Official-
Who cares? I just feel the need to post Nintendo news because I get press releases from them and so I feel special. Far more interesting was the inclusion of a November 15th release date of New Super Mario Bros. The only Wii retail game I intend on buying this entire year. Oops, except Excite Bots. That was this year. That game is STILL awesome.

THAT’S IT FOLKS! That’s all that’s swirling around in my mind at the moment. I’ve been back to work and off my sleeping schedule, but let’s hope that changes tomorrow and you see me back in my regular posting-complete-nonsense form! SUCK IT!

Part Three – The Future: Continue With Curiousity.

Friday, August 28th, 2009

I’m back!
Alright, let’s dive in. I’ve told you about my reservations and my excitement, so I think it’s about time we got the speculation train chugging.

Who is controlling whom?

Who is controlling whom?

Gameplay-
One of the most interesting things about The Last Guardian is the very strong suggestion that you play as a child. And going by the way Team ICO designs games, I’m also going to assume that you don’t really get beefed up as the game progresses either. In the E3 trailer, the child is shown struggling against a guard and any time he prevailed over one, it was because he used the environment to his advantage, not because he whipped out some crazy ninja moves. So how will the child interact with the beast? Will it be like Agro? Controllable, but with a mind of its own? I can hardly imagine that every time you ride the beast, you’ll be required to watch a cut scene. That just seems mad. But then again, wouldn’t the child be too overpowered with the beast? Well it seems obvious that the beast is too large or too clumsy to follow the child everywhere, because we see the kid inside a castle or a cave without the beast. But why does he even go to those places? Does he need to collect certain things to escape? Does he even need to escape? But I suppose now I’m touching on…

Story-

Best Buddies before a Beautiful Backdrop

Best Buddies before a Beautiful Backdrop

What is this beast? How did he meet the child? Who is the child? How did the beast escape from the chain we saw at the beginning of the trailer? The beast has the very important horns seen in all three games. Perhaps this is yet another prequel? Or maybe a tale to properly take place after ICO on the rough timeline. WHO KNOWS?! I actually didn’t think about story too much before I started talking with fellow fans today, but now that it’s on my mind, it’s actually very intriguing. The premise in Shadow of the Colossus contributed greatly to its mood, so I have to imagine the story will have equal weight in The Last Guardian as well. Innocence and bravery are two themes that come instantly to mind. Misunderstood outcasts seems to be a running theme with Team ICO, and The Last Guardian doesn’t appear to be any different. Actually, it seems to be strongest in this game because of the assumed innocence of the child. Even in Wander’s case, he knew he was entering forbidden land. Wow, the more I discuss the possibilities for this game, the more I get excited for it and my reservations melt away.
But since there’s not really much else to go off of at this point until this year’s Tokyo Game Show, I should leave the rest up to you. What do you expect/hope for in The Last Guardian? Do you care? Let’s have a fanboy fest in the comments below! The promised stupid picture post is still coming, but not until later tonight. Ethos out!